Eddie's First Circus - Part 2

Jessie sat with his chest hunched over his knees, staring at the ground while memories of the assault looped in his mind. His imagination drew out the length of the attack as though the animal trainer never showed up to save Richard, and the damage the odious boy suffered was far more grievous.

Without intervention, the gorilla continued to hammer the boy against the bars until the imaginary Richard’s face was a sticky mess of blood and mangled flesh. But when the boy’s right eye started to drop out of the socket, Jessie shuddered and shoved the image away.

Seconds later, the loop began again with Eddie leaning down to step under the barricade.

Alice’s canvas shoes scuffed through the soil as she scooted closer to Jessie. She’d sent Eddie back into the apartment as soon as they’d returned to the complex, and though she’d waited for Jessie to calm down, it was obvious she wanted to talk. Knowing she did, Jessie avoided looking up at her for the longest time because he couldn’t speak without feeling close to throwing up.

“Hey...” Alice waited until he looked up. “Is there something you’re hiding about your brother, or...or yourself?”

“What do you mean?” Jessie asked.

“Well, you...” Alice stared at Jessie with a troubled look in her eyes. “Before the gorilla attacked that kid, you mentioned having a stray thought about Eddie being able to speak gorilla. I wonder if maybe you might have a similar ability.”

Jessie shrugged. “I don’t think I do. I didn’t understand anything of what Eddie or the gorilla said. But I had a thought that Eddie can speak to more than just gorillas.”

“Something like this happened before?” Alice asked.

“No, it wasn’t this bad. I was seven, and my mom got hooked up with...” Raising a hand to rub the back of his neck, Jessie finally got through the list of names to the right boyfriend. “Tom. He liked to go camping, and I’m sure my mother didn’t. We went camping somewhere in Colorado, but I don’t remember where now. We only spent part of the day at the campsite when my mother dragged Eddie from out of the woods and started screaming at us to pack up everything.

“Back in the car, Tom got mad and demanded an explanation. So my mother said she’d found Eddie playing with two bear cubs while the mother bear watched.” Jessie lowered his head to stare at the ground again. “I thought she was lying to get out of the camping trip, because she said Eddie growled at the bears like he was talking to them. Tom called her crazy, and she kept on ranting. She said the bears answered Eddie.”

“But if he really talked to the gorilla, your brother meant for—”

“I know,” Jessie said.

Alice drew her legs up and hugged her knees to her chest. “There’s something wrong with Eddie.”

Jessie’s face pulled into a bitter scowl. “No kidding?”

“You know what I mean. On the way home, he didn’t get upset until you said they might put the gorilla down. He seemed happy about that kid getting hurt.”

“Yeah, but he called Eddie a retard. I don’t know that it was all Eddie’s fault. Eddie didn’t force him to go back and try...again.” A worried pout etched across Jessie’s face. “But then, with the way my brother walked up to the gorilla, he was almost daring the other kid to try it.

“And...and now that I think about it, there was more to the conversation before Eddie and the gorilla shook hands.” Jessie made a disquieted laugh. “That’s crazy talk, right? I saw him make a deal with the gorilla, and then they shook hands to taunt the kid into going up to the cage.”

“I don’t know what to say.” Alice dropped her head to rest her forehead on her knees. “We can’t tell anyone about this. They wouldn’t believe us anyway.”

Jessie stared at her with an uncertain expression. “I’m more worried about what I’ll say to Eddie. I can’t really scold him, but I need to convince him not to do anything like this again. If he wants an animal to talk to, I’ll ask Henry to get us a dog.”

“A small one,” Alice suggested.

“Yeah.” Jessie stood and stretched out his arms. “I was thinking of a toy Chihuahua.”

Alice got to her feet and patted down the back of her jeans. “You don’t think he can talk to all the animals, do you?”

“I don’t know. This is the first time I’ve ever seen him do it. But before I ask him what languages he knows, I need to stop him from turning into a bully.” Jessie pulled himself up and over the fence, then dug in his coat pocket for a breath mint.

“I can almost understand why he’d snap. He’s teased so often at school for being different.” Alice held out her hand for one of the mints, and Jessie tapped one out before stowing the box.

“The teasing he gets here is nothing compared to what Eddie used to put up with.” He was going to explain further when he noticed the patrol car parked near the entrance of the apartment building.

Jessie and Alice dropped their pace to a crawl when they saw the two police officers standing in the corridor in front of Henry’s apartment.  Jessie tugged out his keys and waved to the officers when they looked around. “Hi. I live in that apartment. Is there a problem?”

“Yeah, there was. We had a report of a fight, but your folks agreed to call it a night. We were just about to leave.” The officer leaned his head over while he looked back and forth between Alice and Jessie. “Are you okay?”

“Yes, I was just worried you were showing up to arrest—my folks for fighting again.” Jessie pointed at Alice. “This is my neighbor. She lives on the other side of my parents’ room, so when I go out to get away from my folks, so does she.”

“Ah, gotcha.” The officer offered an apologetic smile. “I think they should be done for the night, so maybe you can get some rest. You look like you need it.”

“Yeah, I probably do.” Jessie went to the door and opened it. He turned around to wave to Alice. “Good night.”

Henry stood in the living room dressed in only a pair of dark blue plaid pajama pants. Folding his thin, suntanned arms over his pale and flabby chest, Henry’s head bobbled from the door and back to Jessie before his expression became troubled. The head bobbling became more animated, causing the hair combed over his bald spot to stand up like a wavy salt and pepper crest.

As soon as the front door was shut, Henry asked, “Where’s your brother?”

Jessie’s mouth fell open, and he stammered while he pointed at the hall. “H-he should be in our room. I sent him inside as soon as we got back from—from the mall.”

“Check the room.” Henry waved his hand toward the hall. “I might have missed him.”

Jessie walked through the living room to the hallway which led to the two bedrooms and the main bathroom. But Eddie wasn’t in the bedroom, and he wasn’t in the bathroom either. Acting on a wild hunch, Jessie checked the laundry hamper, and then the dryer. Neither were out of the realm of possible options where Eddie was likely to hide, but both were empty.

As he shut the dryer, Jessie’s memory started to nag at him about the point at which Eddie’s sunny disposition faded. Alice was right, and during the bus trip back to the apartment complex, Eddie was beaming with pride over his “victory.”

Jessie felt repulsed by Eddie’s smile, and he wanted to say something to wipe the grin from his bother’s face. After trying a few variations of “That was the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen,” Jessie switched tactics and said, “You know they’re going to put the gorilla down for attacking someone, right?”

Which had done the trick of course. But Jessie’s attempt at scolding only prompted his brother to come up with a new plan, and Jessie didn’t want to imagine what Eddie would come up with next.

Walking back into the living room, he debated on whether to come clean with Henry or not. “Hey Hen—Dad, you know the mall we went to?”

Henry shook his head. “No, I can’t say that I do.”

Jessie bit his tongue and counted to three. “There was a circus in the mall parking lot.”

Henry frowned and raised a hand to scratch his stubble covered cheek while his drunken brown eyes squinted in a look of deep concentration. “Is Eddie going to join them?”

Jessie’s face froze in a look of annoyance, but he decided to nod and go with the path of least resistance. “Yes, I think he wants to join the circus. Can you put your shoes and a shirt on, because we need to—”

“Hey, son, I’d like to help.” Henry shook his head quickly, which in turn caused his skinny body to sway. “But the thing is, I’ve just polished off my third beer, and I can’t drive without weaving.”

“Well, that’s just great. Mandy—”

“She can’t drive a standard.” Henry glanced back at the master bedroom door and heaved a sigh. “God graced her with tits and little else.”

“Jeez, Dad—” Jessie whined.

“Listen son, I’ll give you money for bus fare to the mall, and you can take a cab back. I’ll come out and pay them when you get home.” Henry paused to belch before he asked, “Will that work?”

Jessie gaped at Henry until he thought, Take the deal. That’s better than Mom would have offered.

“Yeah, okay. But you can’t complain if I get home late.” Jessie glanced down when Henry opened his wallet. “Hey, can I have a couple extra dollars? While I’m at the mall, I can pick up some acne medicine.”

“I don’t see any acne.” Henry leaned over to peer at his son’s face. “Nah, you look fine to me.”

“Yes, and that’s because I still have a few cleaning pads left,” Jessie said.

Henry sighed and nodded before he grudgingly handed over a five-dollar bill. “You’re bleeding me dry, boy.”

“Thank you for the help. I’ll be back when I find Eddie.” Folding the bill around his thumb, Jessie tucked the five in his hip pocket and walked to the door. He stopped when Henry cleared his throat and turned around. “Yes?”

Henry held out his arms. “How about a hug for your old man? I’m feeling kinda worried about Eddie too, you know.”

Is he fucking serious? The thought registered on Jessie’s face as an angry scowl, and Henry sighed before he waved at the door.

“Never mind. Just go find your bother.”

Jessie shut the door, then thumped his forehead on it. He had an urge to keep thumping until he knocked himself out, but he turned the idea down. Henry will open the door long before I get it right.

Next, he gave thought to bringing Alice along for the trip, but decided she’d had enough shocks for one night.

He walked to the bus stop alone and tried to figure out what his brother would do. Obviously Eddie would be returning to the circus, but to do what? Would he try to talk the circus staff out of putting down the gorilla? Jessie tried to imagine his brother talking to strangers, and the idea didn’t seem very likely. But when he thought of Eddie sneaking into an office to grab keys, it seemed even less likely.

A white van pulled up to the curb and made Jessie regret his choice to walk alone the instant he saw it slowing down. But when he found the driver staring directly at him, his feelings of anxiety became a full blown panic.

The driver had a pudgy, sweat covered face, and the only facial hair he had was a dark line of fuzz above his upper lip. His forehead was broad and sloped low over green eyes which were spread too far apart. A curly mop of dirty reddish brown hair surrounded his head, though the front was slicked back from a recent fit of sweating.

In one glance, Jessie knew the driver was tweaked on something, and he got up from the bus stop bench to walk to the intersection. When the van picked up speed to catch up to him, he started jogging.

The walk signal and traffic light were both red, and the flow of traffic in front of Jessie moved at a near constant pace. Jessie stopped at the corner and stabbed the walk signal rapidly, as though thumping the button faster could hurry up the timing of the traffic lights.

He gave only a half second of thought to running through traffic before a bus whizzed past him. No, I always sucked at playing Frogger.

Jessie risked a glance sideways toward the van to look for the license plate, but he couldn’t see it from where he was standing. The twin cargo doors in the passenger side of the van were windowless, but Jessie had the impression that someone was poised behind them, tensed and waiting for the chance to leap out and snatch a child.

When Jessie’s gaze drifted to the passenger window rolling down, the driver grinned, exposing his broken yellowed teeth. “Hey kid, do you need a ride somewhere?”

Jessie shook his head and made a thin lipped smile which looked more like a pained grimace. “No thanks, I’m fine. Just going to the store for a soda before the bus shows—”

“You don’t need the bus,” the driver said. “I can take you wherever you want to go.”

“I said no, thank you.”

The traffic light changed, and the driver accelerated the van to turn the corner and cut Jessie off. Jessie ran around the back of the van. He heard the cargo doors click as he rounded the bumper and sprinted across the street toward the gas station.

He was in the parking lot of the station when the van’s engine roared, and he spun his head to check which way it went. But the sound of a much closer engine drew his attention instead to the car pulling up to the pumps. The man inside the car was staring over the passenger seat at the pumps instead of looking ahead to see where he was going.

Slapping his hand on the hood of the car to catch the driver’s attention, Jessie veered left to avoid being hit by the bumper. He was grabbing the handle of the glass doors into the store when the car’s tires chirped and the driver honked his horn. Jessie had a few choice words for the driver come to mind, but he didn’t bother slowing down until he was inside the store by the cashier.

The door beeped. The slack jawed cashier blinked before his gaze drifted from the  intersection to the door hissing as it closed. Then he turned his head to stare at Jessie with a puzzled expression. “Weren’t you just...” The cashier trailed off while he pointed out toward the street.

Then he noticed how much Jessie was wheezing for air and frowned with obvious concern. “Hey, if you’re feeling sick, the bathroom is back by the ATM.”

Shaking his head, Jessie panted for a few seconds longer before he could talk. “I gotta quit smoking.”

The cashier snorted and leaned over to rest his arms on the counter. “I saw that guy in the van messing with you. Do you want me to call the cops?”

“No, I can’t worry about a couple of perverts in a van tonight. I’ve got bigger problems to worry about.” Jessie slowed down his panting and heaved a slow sigh to calm himself. Noticing the cashier’s worried expression, he faked a smile. “So, I guess I’ll be having the mango slushee and a cheese on a stick.”

The cashier laughed and nodded. “Right away, sir.”

Jessie glanced back at the window and saw the van had pulled back around. He waved at the driver before turning his hand to flip a middle finger. “Hey, did you get any new comics in?”

“No, we don’t get ours until next week, I think.” Jessie dropped his hand before the cashier turned around to set the slushee cup on the counter. “We only get the Archie’s and Ninja Turtles.”

“Yeah, the turtles will work.” Jessie picked up the cup and took a long drink from it. “If someone is getting beaten up, my little brother will like...”

“What’s wrong?” the cashier asked. “Did you get brain freeze?”

“No,” Jessie said before he tapped his finger on the side of his head. “I’m having a dreadful thought, just now.”

“Bummer.” The cashier rang up the purchase. “That’ll be two eighty-five, please.”

Jessie paid for the snacks and went to stand on the curb outside the store where he could see the bus coming and be able to run to catch it.

He let his mind go back to the realization that Eddie was trying to act like one of the characters from his comic books. In their fictional world, beating people up solved just about every problem. Basing his decisions on such flawed logic, it seemed likely Eddie was going to somehow plan a rescue for the gorilla.

Then Jessie couldn’t help but give in to his feelings of guilt, because he’d encouraged his brother to read comics. He never saw the harm in buying them because he didn’t want to admit how separated his brother was from reality.

Eddie running around in a cape by himself was cute, but Eddie running around with a six hundred pound gorilla was a dreadful thought. Jessie’s mind evoked a mental image of a trail of victims lying on a sidewalk behind the ape. Each victim’s face bore a similar mask of mutilation, and thin rivulets of blood leaking from the victims merged into a wide stream in the gutter.

Jessie was so lost in the morbid thought that he stopped paying attention. He didn’t notice the shadow moving in front of his feet until a hand closed over his shoulder. Grunting in shock, he yanked his shoulder back to pry himself free before he looked up. Panic loosened both his hands, and then he and Alice had to backpedal to get away from the slushee cup before it burst on the pavement.

Jessie frowned at Alice. “What are you doing here?”

“I forgot I was still carrying the rest of your change, so I went over to give it back. I got enough of the story from Henry to figure out where you were heading.” Alice stepped around the spreading ice and syrup puddle to stand beside Jessie. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you were so preoccupied.”

“No, it’s okay.” Jessie leaned over to pick up the cup and the cheese stick to carry them to a trash bin. “I was just thinking about Eddie.”

“He is going back to the circus to do something even worse, isn’t he?” Alice asked.

 “Yes, I think so.” Jessie checked the intersection while he wiped his fingers against the sides of his jeans to clean them. “If he does, you know what a ten-year-old with a comic book fetish can do with a six hundred pound gorilla?” Alice shook her head, and he made a humorless snort. “Whatever he wants.”